HTML Preview Harvard Scholarship page number 1.
Cover Letter
Dear Dr. McKetta,
At the beginning of this course, I wasn’t sure whether I had the ability to write an
academic paper in English. Your wonderful comments gave me self-confidence and
motivated me to do better each time. I even discovered a passion for English rhetoric, and I
keep learning new things everyday.
I strive to explain a difficult issue with simple words, and this might be the strength of
my essay. Thanks to you and my peer review group, I managed to improve it.
Introduction: I added a subtitle as you advised me to do. I also moved the thesis to the very
end of my paragraph to meet the MLA requirements. I modified it for clarity purposes:
Old thesis: “Despite being committed to wealthy alumni, and consequently, to some legacies,
Harvard strives to recruit deserving students. New thesis: “Despite its commitment to wealthy
alumni, Harvard strives to recruit motivated, courageous, and deserving students.”
Body paragraphs: I improved the transitions, and added, among other things, a passage about
the Harvard Extension School. I was indeed truly disappointed to hear from one of my peer
reviewers that “anyone can attend and earn a degree from Harvard, especially via their
extension school” because “Harvard welcomes everyone who can pay” and that I am “not
informed” as I live outside the US. I should open my eyes and “unplug from the Matrix.” And
yet, my methodology is simple: I write what I think, and I prove what I write. I also replaced
“less deserving legacy students” by “some legacy students,” as many of them work hard due
to familiar pressure (thanks Christine for noticing it!).
Conclusion: I ended on a positive note this time!
Thank you sincerely,
Student